Level Up Your Happiness
How is the end of 2022 shaping up? Here is how to make the end of this year happier and more meaningful.
As I walk into all the large department stores and home improvement stores, I am hit with the reality that we are getting close enough to the holidays that Christmas decor is going full steam. Saturday is the first day of the last quarter of the year, so I suppose that is okay, but still, it would be nice to get through Halloween before I can purchase a picture-perfect tree that will never drop needles or smell like the real thing.
The holidays have a way of dominating our waking moments once they start in full force. You have 32 days before the start of Halloween, which is when people will start asking you to donate extra time, and your calendar will start filling up with end-of-the-year shenanigans. So before holiday shopping and craziness fills your mental space, take some time to consider what you want most out of the last three months of the year. What will be the most valuable? What will drive you to a good place by the end of the year? What will make you happy about how your year wrapped up?
The Pursuit of Happiness
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
Most of us recognize these words unless you grew up outside the United States. They are taken from the Declaration of Independence, a founding document of the country. Most of us believe that part of what we do and what drives us is the pursuit of happiness, but in reality, it is probably a bit more human than that unless we step outside ourselves and look at the big picture of what we really want.
We all know that money can’t buy happiness because it hasn’t done it for anyone yet. The famous and rich people we all know go through the same mental health issues we all do and maybe worse. But we are all willing to try and see if it could be different for us. What does this have to do with figuring out how to finish up the rest of your 2022? Well often it is important to have a zoom out moment to check out what really matters so you can zoom into the end of the year on what will make a difference.
Zoom Out: What Makes Us Happier?
There is a Hospice nurse named Bonnie Ware who wrote a memoir about her time working with people who had 3-6 weeks left on this earth. Her memoir discusses the commonality of their regrets regardless of their status and wealth.
I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
I wish I hadn't worked so much.
I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
I wish that I had let myself be happier.
In 1938, during the Great Depression, scientists began tracking the health of 268 Harvard sophomores and other 19-year-olds from poor regions in Boston. They still, to this day, track the men who are alive and have started tracking their kids. What does this study have to do with happiness or the top five regrets of the dying? The study has found that the people with the strongest relationships lived longer, and reported higher levels of happiness and satisfaction.
Zoom In: How to Make Happiness Happen
“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
Ensue: happen or occur afterward or as a result.
We can reverse engineer happiness by looking at both the Top 5 Regrets of the Dying and the Harvard study,. Happiness is living a life of courage where you work as much as necessary and as little as possible. Happiness is living a life where you tell people what they mean to you and spend time developing a relationship with those who bring joy to your life.
Suppose the most significant predictor of success, according to the longest study on adult development that's ever been done is the quality of a person's relationships. In that case, really, your happiness is something you get to decide.
Your 2022 happiness quota will level out to the quality of your relationships,. SO are you in the right community? Who are you doing life with? Take a minute to think of the people you know that are doing what you want to do and see who they spend time with. If you are lucky enough to be in a group of friends or a spouse that pushes you forward and helps you to reach for your goals then plan some specific time with them. Make weekly date nights or monthly gatherings a thing for the last three months of the year. Level up your happiness, create meaning and purpose for the last three months of this year. The best is yet to come.
DIG (Get Deliberate, Get Inspired, Get Going) Deep Action Steps:
Get Deliberate: So seriously open that calendar and plan date nights or group potlucks with those people you know do life the way you want to do life. Exchange babysitting with another couple to make date nights more accessible. What gets planned gets done.
Get Inspired: Find something fun that you have wanted to try but haven’t made the time for. I signed my husband and I up for a hand-building
pottery class and it has been fun getting dirty and creative. I also have been meaning to try out a fun double date idea. Go to Goodwill or a thrift store of your choosing. Everyone buys something a bit outlandish and then go to dinner in your new duds. Search the internet for other ideas or join Facebook groups for tips and tricks.
Get Going: Is your calendar open yet? OPEN IT. Message someone with the two dates that work for you and make a plan. Let me know what you have cooked up! I am excited for the relationships you are strengthening and the happiness you are creating.